I am a terrible journal writer.

It's been that way forever. I was always attracted to the idea of having a journal; a place where you can jot down what happened to you during the day, in order to make sense of it all. A place where you could write your secret wishes and dreams, or share the crush you have on some boy. A journal would also let me look back at myself from the future, and remember the person I used to be.

As a kid, I decided to start a diary and vowed to myself that I would keep up with it. I promised to write at least every week if not every day, even if it was only about insignificant events of the day, the little things occupying my mind, or a sketch of a little piece of my life. I even named my diary Claire, after having read The Diary of Anne Frank.

I failed. Completely and utterly.

Claire lasted about a month. Which is by far longer than any of my other attempts at a journal as a kid.

And that is why you will probably never see another journal entry after this.

I still wish I was good at journal writing, but I guess that's just not who I am. I'm too scatter-brained and impatient to sit down everyday and write down my thoughts in an organized manner.

Instead I doodle. I doodle onto everything. If there is a paper near me, and I have access to a writing utensil, you can be sure, that paper will be filled with random designs, drawings, and sentences in no time. On my desk, there is a plastic cover to protect the wood, and (surprise surprise) it is full of sharpie doodles of anything that ever came to mind.

Doodling is the closest I have to a journal. It is a way for me to jot down my emotions and thoughts. Maybe I should start a doodle journal. A notebook where I could date a page, and just doodle all over it.

I bet you anything I would end up abandoning it after two days.